A Ragamuffin's Peace Giver

I have had quite a bit of anxiety and 'overwhelmedness' lately. Hence, the reason I haven't blogged in a while. The 'urgent' has been stealing my time away from the 'important'. This happens a lot to me. I feel so many things in my life are urgent. I sometimes live in the 'urgent mode'. Rush to finish this, rush to pay that, rush to go here, rush to go there.... rush, rush, rush! I'm being pulled in a million directions and spread so thin that there isn't enough of me to have any substance left. The anxiety and stress that I feel, leave me with feelings of inadequacy, guilt and hopelessness. What can I do to get out of this 'sense of urgency mode' and find some peace of mind and rest?

The answer is so simplistic, yet evades me so easily: Prayer and Priorities. Bible and Boundaries. Meditation and Moderation. It all goes back to dependence on the Peace Giver, himself. Going to Jesus and asking for guidance with my priorities. What does he want me to accomplish this day? What does he want me to say "no" to today? Oh... there's a dirty word: No. But Jesus practiced it when he was doing his earthly ministry. He had boundaries. He made time for prayer and quiet meditation and sought his Father's will continuously. He was not so caught up in the urgency of the needs of the people, that he did not do the important tasks the Father had given him to do. Even in regards to very close friends that he loved. He was given news that a dear friend Lazarus, whom he loved, the Bible says, was very sick and near death. Yet, he stayed where he was for two more days. He didn't drop everything and rush to his bedside to heal him. God had bigger plans. Lazarus died and was buried. His sisters must have thought Jesus had abandoned them. But the bigger plan was revealed when Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead and proclaimed, "I am the Resurrection and Life." Jesus prayed at the end of his short life of 33, "I have finished the work you gave me to do." Was everyone healed? No. Was everyone saved? No. But he had finished the work that God had given him to do. He had peace with that. He didn't have regrets about what he didn't get to do. He trusted the Father had bigger plans and rested in that fact, although anguished about the cross that was to come.

I guess I need to seek the Lord's will for the priorities of my life each day. Looking back on the urgency-mode and anxiety attacks I have had this past week, I tried to figure out what I could have done to prevent them. I needed a plan. I needed to evaluate my priorities. I needed quiet meditation before God to seek his will and receive strength from him. I needed to not be pulled into the bondage of the urgency that I felt when everyone was pulling me in every direction. I needed quiet dependence on the Lord. He wants me to come to him and be dependent on him. I believe that self sufficiency is one of the worst sins I can commit. Trying to do everything in my own strength is saying to God, "I don't need you, God. I can do it on my own." Being independent is how the world says we need to be. But Jesus said, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." What a wonderful promise. So simple and yet so powerful.

Oh my Lord, I thank you for your word. It is light and life to me. I praise you for revealing my need to depend on you. Forgive me for being independent and thinking I can do it on my own, in my own strength. I know what happens then: I am pulled by anything and everything that calls out to me. Help me to know, that you have set the purpose and priorities in my life. I need to seek you to find what is really important compared to the urgency of the moment. You know me better than I know myself and you know what my boundaries are and what I am able to do. Please give me the wisdom to know that too. Help me daily to remember this: "Do not worry about anything, but pray and ask God for everything you need, always giving thanks. And God's peace, which is so great we cannot understand it, will keep your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus." And, "I leave you peace; my peace I give you. I do not give it to you as the world does. So don't let your hearts be troubled or afraid." Thank you, Lord for calming this anxious Ragamuffin's heart with your peace.

Thank you my Peace Giver,
Your Ragamuffin Girl.


Scripture References: Matt. 11:28 NIV, Philippians 4:6-7 NCV, John 14:27 NCV